Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Day 233

another month is almost over and now, nearly, another year. i find it a coincidence to be spending a consecutive new years eve in canada, this year now following last years roadtrip with my cousin to phillip's square in downtown toronto. wildest dreams would have never fabricated any of this that is now the present.

but that's kind of where i am right now tonight- picturing all this in my head and re-appreciating the big picture. there's routine. this is life. i still enjoy rice and beans for dinner all the while thankful and knowing that i'd rather be happy and free and living all this with rice and beans than finding solace in a regulated and uninventive manner of living.

a few of us went on a tim horton's run tonight after an sfc dodgeball competition. tim's is just down the highway and three of us walked along the piled snowbanks under a surprisingly warm evening. we passed the best western hotel and i remembered that first weekend here and temporary homelessness and showing up to church with all our luggage with the faith that things would work out. we left church that morning with friends, a temporary home, and i got a definite and much-needed job. before all this in the middle of the summer, my friend's dad told me about one of his former preaching students who was now working as a pastor in fernie. the fernie plans were still young during that stage and even though there are a few churches in town, i've only become involved with one- the one i'd heard about months and months before at that table in langley . that connection still blows my mind sometimes.

earlier today as these thoughts started to come together, the people who had picked me up to take me to the hill this morning were talking about the avalanche victims. apparently one of the people my driver works with was friends with all of those covered in snow and has lately only found comfort in drinking. even now i think of a friend from high school who's fiance, also one of my friends from college, was killed in a farming accident towards the end of the summer. and even though it wasn't as much of a surprise as the former, my own grandpa's death leaves me feeling a little stunned sometimes.

i'm trying to find a balance. more purpose.

pastor shawn and i are scheduled to hang out over the next couple weeks during his scheduled pulpit break. i'm looking forward to talking with him and to ask questions about faith and moving mountains and purposes and maybe, through it all, find a little more reasons for why i've been led here in such a unique way.

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